School

As I have resorted to only writing inexplicable and ludicrous texts, here we go again. And I quote: (this time from a comedy show by Lewis Black) "I've seen the end of the Universe and it's in the United States and oddly enough it's in Houston, Texas. Imagine my surprise, when I left the comedy club one day and walked to the end of the block. And on one streetcorner there was a Starbucks... And opposite to that Starbucks, in the same exact building as that Starbucks, there was a Starbucks. I looked back and forth, thinking the Sun was playing tricks with my eyes. But there was a Starbucks across from a Starbucks. [...] What kind of people need the service of a Starbucks across from a Starbucks. I thought about this long and hard and I found only one group people. There's only one group of people that would make this joke of mine work. And these are people with Alzheimer's. It has to be a group of people that can drink coffee all day and then walk across the floor and open the door and say: "Gentlemen, do my eyes decieve me? I believe that's a Starbucks. I believe that it's time for a cup-a-Joe!" [...] I say that's the end of the Universe. People ask how do I know. I say, go there, look at your watch, time stands still!"

Stand still and observe - observe people all around you and respect them. I know I'm in search of the utopic way of life. But I can't help it. I just need to see happiness. All I can see in people, are insults, deceitfulness, disillusionment, heartache and despair. People may seem to happy and confident on the first glance. But when looked deeper and deeper inside people, I have come to find out, that most people are insecure inside, like lost puppies in a crowded fun-fair, like lost little children in a crowded Madonna concert. All are in search and pursuit of something . . . most are pursuing goals, that they will never achieve. And most have seen troubled times and have been hurt - severely. And I feel sorry for them. As Eminem sang . . . "I can see you're sad, even when you smile, even when you laugh, I can see it in your eyes, deep inside you wanna cry, cause you're scared [...]"

That's what I have noticed too - the eyes betray us. I have seen it far too often to take it non-chalantly. I care, believe it or not. I just met a wonderful person and even though she smiles a lot and she has a very beautiful smile, I can see in her eyes that she's troubled, she's having a problem, a memory she can't get rid of. She is slightly older than me and yet as I peek inside herself, I see that her heart and soul are younger than me. She hides, like most of us, behind a pretended faćade of confidence. And I feel so bad and I feel so sad for them, for I don't have a heart, I have a piece of flint as a heart-substitute. I'd like to comfort all those people, but I'm too selfish . . .

With that I leave you today to sit and wonder - what the f**k is wrong with this EMO? And I grant you that . . . I may be an emo for your eyes and I won't get offended for as I said - my heart has been replaced by a piece of stone-cold flint.

Uutšitsja, uutšitsja, uutšitsja

Eks nii see läheb . . . kirjutangi eesti keeles. No, vahepeal ikka võib. Blogid . . . ja kõik muu jura siin elus saab kord otsa. Saab otsa raha, sest seda pole tegelikult kunagi olnudki; saab otsa sõprus, sest ka selline asi tegelikult ei eksisteeri (on vaid keemilised reaktsioonid inimeste kehades, mis saavad alguse aju erinevaist kihtidest ja piirkondadest) jne jne jne. Saab otsa kõik hea ja saab otsa kõik halb. Õhus on tunda lõppemise lõhna. Iga suletud ukse kohta on kuskil avatud aken ja vice versa (parafraseering).

"You gotta laugh while you can." (Carlos Mencia). Pidage see meeles! "Be on the look-out for things that make you laugh, if you see nothing worth laughing at, pretend you see it, then laugh!" (Bill Bailey, Black Books. Pidage ka see meeles.

Ja dieedifriikidele kogu maailmas: "Viis minutit naeru asendab pätsi leiba!" (Five minutes of laughter substitutes a loaf of bread.) (N.Nossov)

Lõpetaks selle kõige loogikavastasema blogi tsitaadiga filmist "Johnny English" . . . "Jesus is coming, act busy!"

आईटी'स थे फिनल कोउन्त्दोवं.

नो, इ वास अस्केद तो राइट अन एंडिंग तो माय ब्लॉग। तेरे विल बे नोन - अस माय ब्लॉग इस थे वे आईटी इस बेकाउसे आईटी इस थे वे आईटी इस। इफ आईटी वासन'टी वे आईटी इस, आईटी वौल्दं'टी बे थऐ वे आईटी इस।
आईटी वास फूं फॉर अ व्हिले। थैंक्स फॉर बीइंग हियर विथ में एंड एवें रीडिंग सम ऑफ़ थे जंक इ पोस्टेड हियर।

इ नेवर क्नेव व्रितिंग कोउल्ड बे थिस फूं, बुत नो इ क्नोव - वहत'स फूं फॉर में, दोएसं'टी गो वेल विथ ओथेर पीपुल। नेवेर मंद - इ'ल सून बे ऑफ़।

:) बाय, या'ल

I've got N'Sync, Aerosmith and Britney . . . and I'm confused

"Here we are - born to be kings. We're the princes of the Universe." (Queen)

Still, what are we really - a complex compilation of even more complex systems . . . (like the self-replicating DNA etc). We are just beings looking for a place in this world. Some of us choose totally wrong careers - that's why we see so many angry people amongst ourselves: shop-keepers who despise their every client; taxi-drivers who despise their every client; police officers who despise their every "client". And then there are those, who read too much into things - get offended for a totally meaningless blog; those who see the world plainly in black and white; those who seem to find it totally absurd to even consider a meaningful argument. I reminds me of Carlos Mencia: "How retarded do you have to be to look at a dog and say: "Hey, that's me!!!"?.

We all come from different backgrounds, we all have different views, we all see the world and other people differently. As I have said - I don't consider myself superior nor inferior to any human being - I just am. Let's get this straight once and for all. I do not exalt myself above anyone. Nor do I berate myself. I do not think that I'm better than anyone and I refuse to believe that I'm not as good as everyone else. I just exist . . . We all have the same opportunities - we all start from scratch. (Robin Williams: "Some people are born great, some achieve greatness, some get it as a graduation gift!")
I disagree to some extent - Ok, some people acquire a certain position thanks to their parents. But to be a "great person" - that's a different thing altogether. Some say - genes make out what we are to become . . . nope - the person makes out what becomes of him/her. Who becomes a great person, is successful. Who does not - is not successful and has only himself to blame. The ones that do not achieve greatness, only find excuses - like me . . . (I always make the sort of excuses Carlos Mencia would murder me for: "If a black man can't get a job, the white men took it; when a woman can't get a job, the men with their evil penises of death took it etc.)

Only that I don't make excuses about my job, cause I don't work yet. But the idea remains the same.

OK, that post made no sense once again, so Helena can be happy about her again. (but one good day I will set fire to a house that carries a name "Alekand's house" on it). And to close this post off, I need to apologize to all the people I have hurt directly and indirectly with my posts. I apologize sincerely, for I never wanted to hurt anyone. And to let you all - 3 of you, right? - know, that from now on I might be posting only short and meaningless posts here with all my other posts will go to another, private blog, that only I can view (thanks to some angry "fan-mail" - it only confirmed my initial idea, that this blog is a waste of everyone else's time).

I know noone cares, but as my ideas are not accepted by others (although I knew that beforehand) I decided to not make matters worse by trying to change this blog or my views. I'll just move on to publishing my own views to only myself. It was great writing to you, guys - Merlin, Helena, Helena and Kristi. Sorry to have taken up so much of your time. Bye.

Hear ye! Hear ye!

I could've gone my whole life without knowing some things I do happen to know by accident. Like who fucked who at what time, who screwed (two possibilities here) who - where and when, who had a secret of some kind that noone knew about etc etc etc

What baffles me, is how people find me to be as a good listener. I hardly ever listen to a person very thoroughly - unless I like the person very much, of course. I usually have nothing to say to these people, nor can I sympathise with them (an obscure idea in itself, I know).

But all of that is just a little filler to move on to the next bit. Whenever talking to fellow humans . . . we talk in Estonian. I have some friends to talk to in English, as well . . . Now, I'm no linguist, but . . . I must agree with John Humphries - there is too much idiotic language around. We all know what the person tries to say even though they strangle and massacre the language which they are using. "From empty cliche to meaningless jargon, dangling participle to sentences without verbs, the English language is reeling. It is under attack from all sides. Politicians dupe us with deliberately evasive language. Bosses worry about impacting the bottom line while they think out of the box. Academics talk obscure mumbo jumbo. Journalists and broadcasters, who should know better, lazily collaborate. John Humphrys wittily and powerfully exposes the depths to which our beautiful language has sunk and offers many examples of the most common atrocities. He also dispenses some sensible guidance on how to use simple, clear and honest language. Above all, he shows us how to be on the alert for the widespread abuse - especially by politicians - and the power of the English language."

It applies to every language spoken. Now, I know that I'm no master of language - I use dumb phrases and repetitions and my spelling and grammar are at best woeful. I decided against trying to post a "reader's letter" to Postimees or any other online newspaper long ago. It's not like I have nothing to say, rather than I know noone wants to read my views or even publish them - I do not represent the public view. But when I do, when I do publish anything - even on this blog, I try my best to make it easily readable, understandable, and correct in any way - at least I try. When I mispronounce a word, I usually notice it. The same with mistyping - I try my best . . .

I only wish it applied to everyone - but it doesn't. How is it possible, I don't understand, to murder a language and not even think about the consequences? When I use bad and broken language at home - it's ok, as long as my kids never hear it. It is always acceptable, if you are the only one suffering from the bad language you use. But when others are affected by it - well, I just think that't wrong. I know there's no stopping the downfall - most of teachers are not capable of pouring wisdom into childrens' heads and that's how it's supposed to be. Kids should want to learn - but they don't - rather, they'd like to learn a language from a computer-game or a video-game or a cartoon or on the backs of Yu-Gi-Oh playing cards. So they learn all the angry expressions like "slay, defeat, murder, monster, hideous, deranged" and so on and so forth. And respect for teachers has undergone a major degression . . . It is exponentially harder to please kids as a teacher, especially when you are only 6-7 years older than your pupils (as most young, bright, talented, fresh-out-of-school teachers are). No respect whatsoever. And it gets worse with the school's level - in higher-rated schools the problem is there, but not that severe. Although, in schools with lower ratings, things are out of hand and there's no cure. The result is this - poor students create poor teachers, poor teachers mean poor teachings and poor teachings lead way to even poorer students. Unless there's a very direct, swift and accurate change in country's educational system, we'll be on a neverending escalator towards lowest achievements imaginible.

I can see you all now - closing your browser windows in outrage - that blog makes no sense - and I quite agree. All I can say, is that I am a very angry little man who feasts on other's happiness and misfortunes. I sometimes do stoop to the level on online commentators and I despise myself for that. But that's just who I am.

People...

As I have come to find out (besides the fact that I don't post very often), people are stupid, ignorant and deceitful. The best way to see that is to read comments on an article. People got furious over the fact that Liis Lass attended the President's reception. People are flustered and angry when a police officer gives a ticket to a person, who doesn't obey traffic-laws. They get mad over the fact that there are more succesluf people in the world. And so on and on and on and on and on. Why is that?

I thought (naively) that maybe it's because Estonian people are just angry and disappointed and jealous, so that they need to axpress their anger in their comments. But no - looking at foreign sites, I see even more anger, even greater accusations, even more bewildering jealousy. Even more so in sports. If a player, who plays for the national side (that seems to indicate that the person is very good at what one's doing), misses a penalty-kick or a free-throw or doesn't make a touchdown or fails to complete a homerun, people treat it as it was the end of days.

I have managed to keep myself away from posting any comments and some people seem to think that I have acted wrongly. No, I just keep my cool and try not to stoop to their (internet commentators's) level. Even if I post anything on a website . . . what good is going to come out of it? Is Ms Lass going to stop going to these kinds of events? Hardly. Are they going to let the player take the kick again? Never. Is the player going to quit his job as a professional player? Not in a million years. Are the police going to annulate their ticket? Nope.

Therefore I see no point. Yes, it's everybody's right to express their views. But how to make that view public and be civilised about it as well? There seems no way - as long as people still remain angry about it. There is maybe one comment in twenty that does not act foolhardy . . . One person always expresses their disappointment for the rest of the commentators. And I applaud these people.

Yes, I do get angry from time to time. Yes, I'd like to smash my glass against the wall when my favourite player takes a dive or misses the easiest shot ever. Yes, I am pissed off at politicians who seem to be unable to make a decent decision even if their life depended on it. And how do I feel about Ms Lass . . . well, outrage of course. But never, in my wildest dreams, would I think of going on a ramble on the Internet . . . lashing out senseless arguments that change nothing. Where's the fucking point? I have different outlets for my anger - the piano, sports, listening to music, debating in a fierce mood with my family or friends who either agree or disagree with me. I find that working out my anger like that - in a civilised conversation at home or in a pub - has more use to it and reaches more people than sitting at home, fiercely tapping away at your keyboard. (I do realize that what I'm doing right now contradicts everything I have said so far).

But seriously - how retarded do you have to be to say these kinds of things - "Man kills wife for cheating" (the title of the article) and comments - "good riddens" (never mind the grammar or spelling, most of them have never known that it's should have, not should of), or "I woulda done tha same thing" or "well done, mate" or "You aint' cheatin now, are you?:D:D:D" or "but I would of raped her before killing her to show her whos boss ;)" or "I still wait for the law of being able to kill the woman who cheats by throwing stones at her, publicly:)" . . . etc.

Now, my question . . . what goes through their mind when writing that? What are they trying to say? Are they, in their minds, making a funny joke? or in their minds stating an intelligent view? or simply speaking their mind? In any case it shows only their limited brain capacity in doing so. No way would they speak like that if confronted by a reporter in the middle of the street. One other thing I like to do - read forums . . . One especially nice one is the delfi Naistekas. Oh, you could spend hours there, reading really bad Estonian, feeling bad for the person who started the theme. Like - "my husband cheats" (title, followed by an article of one of the saddest stories ever) and the comments are all like ones I described earlier.

It all just makes me sad, that people can be so idiotic, ignorant and plainly cruel. I am disappointed in humans far too often nowadays. I know I sound very much naive right now, but I can't help it. It's just who I am.

Feminism . . . Equality . . .

Well, here I am . . . (DM)

Now I'm going to piss off almost all my readers . . . that's 2 out of 3 at the moment (since 1 is enjoying a nice well-deserved holiday in Canary Islands somewhere). Feminism . . . pretty good idea in my mind. Women should get equal treatment. But . . . they should not moan about it every now and then. If a woman wants to be paid the same amount of money men are paid, they should be able to get what they want. But only when they work the same amount of time, have same working-hours and have the same results.

Hypothetically - there is a job, that needs 30% wit and 70% strength and agility. Two people apply - a man and a woman. Man has to get at least 25 points out of 30 in the strength exam and 20 out of 30 in the intelligence exam. Woman has to get 20 for strength and 17-18 for intelligence. Man gets that needed 25 and 20 and woman gets that 20 and 20. Now, you're the employer - who do you choose? Both are eligible for the job. I would go for the man, won't you? If a man fails a test and a woman succeeds - ok, woman gets the job - even if the man has 30 out of 30 in the physical.

But here's the tricky part - women complain about being mistreated - they are not given the same opportunities as men. They also complain when they are preferred to a job even though a man is better suited. They say, that that describes them as inferior beings - that they somehow need to be treated softer. Which is it then? Are you protesting against not getting enough chances or being given too many chances (maybe unfairly, but still). I can't follow the logic. If I find that the woman can do the work better, of course I'm gonna hire her.
I have to pause here . . . more to come very soon.