I don't need to be told all the things people want to tell me. It's just that I sometimes need to be reminded of them. As some of you (50%, I believe, since there are only two people reading this idiotic piece of writing) may know, a big part of my life is inspired by comedians, songs, poems and books and tv-shows. There are small fragments of wisdom lingering about in almost all of them.
Let's get started with a few from songs. (I'd like to say that I'm using all of the lyrics without permission and I'm expecting a huge law-suit any time now)
First in my list: Eminem.
(Hailie's Song)
Some days I sit, starin' out the window
Watchin' this world pass me by
Sometimes I think theres nothin' to live for
I almost break down and cry
Somtimes I think I'm crazy
I'm crazy, oh so crazy
Why am I here, am I just wasting my time?
But then I see my baby
Suddenly I'm not crazy
It all makes sense when I look into her eyes
[Chorus]
Somtimes it feels like the world's on my shoulders
Everyone's leanin' on me
Cuz sometimes it feels like the world's almost over
But then she comes back to me
/.../
Now you probably get this picture from my public persona
That I'm a pistol-packing drug-addict who bags on his momma,
But I wanna just take this time out to be perfectly honest
Cuz there's a lot of shit I keep bottled that hurts deep inside o' my soul, And just know that I grow colder the older I grow This boulder on my shoulder gets heavy and harder to hold
And this load is like the weight of the world
And I think my neck is breaking should I just give up,
Or try to live up to these expectations?
(Say Goodbye Hollywood)
/.../
Bury my face in comic books, cause I don't want to look
At nothin', this world's too much
I've swallowed all I could
If I could swallow a bottle of tylenol I would, and end it for good
Just say goodbye to Hollywood
I probably should, these problems are piling all at once
Cause everything that bothers me, I got it bottled up
I think i'm bottomin' out
But i'm not about to give up, I gotta get up
/.../
I don't wanna quit, but shit, I feel like this is it
/.../
It's like the boy in the bubble, who never could adapt, i'm trapped
/.../
Till I Collapse
'Cause sometimes you feel tired,
feel weak, and when you feel weak, you feel like you wanna just give up.
But you gotta search within you, you gotta find that inner strength
and just pull that shit out of you and get that motivation to not give up
and not be a quitter, no matter how bad you wanna just fall flat on your face and collapse.
/.../
And its absurd how people hang on every word.
I’ll probably never get the props I feel I ever deserve
But I’ll never be served my spot is forever reserved
If I ever leave earth that would be the death of me first.
Cause in my heart of hearts I know nothing could ever be worse.
When the Music Stops
Music, reality, sometimes it's hard to tell the difference
/.../
If I were to die murdered in cold blood tomorrow
Would you feel sorrow or show love
Or would it matter
Can never be the lead-off batter of things
Shit for me to feed off
I'm see-saw battling
But theres way too much at stake for me to be fake
There's too much on my plate
And I came way too far in this game to turn and walk away
And not say what I got to say
What the fuck you take me for? a joke? you smoking crack?
Before I do that, I beg Mariah to take me back
I get up 'for I get down, run myself in the ground, 'for I put some wack shit out
I'm trying-a smack this one out the park, five-thousand mark
You all steady trying to drown the shark
Ain't gonna do nothing but piss me off
Lid to the can of whoop ass, just twist me off
See me leap out, pull the piece out, fuck shooting I'm just trying to knock his teeth out
Fuck with me now, bitch, let's see you freestyle
Talk is cheap, motherfucker if you're really feeling froggish, leap
You're slim, you're gonna let him get away with that?
He tried to play you, you can't let him 'scape with that
Man I hate this crap, this ain't rap,
This is crazy the way we act
When we confuse hip-hop with real life when the music stops
/.../
Music's changed my life in so many ways
Brains confused and fucked since the 5th grade
Rock Bottom
This song is dedicated to all the happy people
All the happy people who have real nice lives
And who have no idea whats it like to be broke as fuck
[Verse One:]
I feel like I'm walking a tight rope, without a circus net
I'm popping percocets, I'm a nervous wreck
/.../
That's Rock Bottom
When this life makes you mad enough to kill
That's Rock Bottom
When you want something bad enough to steal
That's Rock Bottom
When you feel you have had it up to here
Cause you mad enough to scream but you sad enough to tear
[Verse Two:]
My life is full of empty promises
And broken dreams
I'm hoping things will look up
But there ain't no job openings
I feel discouraged hungry and malnourished
Living in this house with no furnace, unfurnished
And I'm sick of working dead end jobs with lame pay
And I'm tired of being hired and fired the same day
But fuck it, if you know the rules to the game play
Cause when we die we know were all going the same way
It's cool to be player, but it sucks to be the fan
When all you need is bucks to be the man
Plus a luxury sedan
Too comfortable and roomy in a six
They threw me in the mix
With all these gloomy lunatics
Walk around depressed
And smoke a pound of ses a day
And yesterday went by so quick it seems like it was just today
My daughter wants to throw the ball but I'm too stressed to play
Live half my life and throw the rest away
[Chorus]
There's people that love me and people that hate me
But it's the evil that made me this backstabbing, deceitful, and shady
I want the money, the women, the fortune, and the fame
That Means I'll end up burning in hell scorching in flames
That means I'm stealing your checkbook and forging your name
Lifetime bliss for eternal torture and pain
Right now I feel like just hit the rock bottom
I got problems now everybody on my blocks got 'em
My Dad's Gone Crazy
There's no mountain i can't climb
There's no tower too high,
No plane that i can't learn how to fly
What do i gotta do to get through to you, to show you
There ain't nothing i can't take this chainsaw to
/.../
My songs can make you cry, take you by surprise
And at the same time, make you dry your eyes with the same rhyme
See what you're seeing is a genius at work
Which to me isn't work, so it's easy to misinterpret it at first,
Cuz when i speak, it's tongue in cheek
I'd yank my fuckin teeth before id ever bite my tongue
I'd slice my gums, get struck by fuckin' lightning twice at once
And die and come back as vanilla ice's son
And walk around the rest of my life spit on
And kicked and hit with shit, every time i sung
Like R Kelly as soon as "bump n' grind" comes on
More pain inside of my brain, than the eyes of a little girl inside of a
plane
Aimed at the World Trade, standin' on Ronnie's grave,
Screaming at the sky, till clouds gather as Clyde Mathers and Bonnie Jade
And thats pretty much the gist of it,Parents are pissed, but the kids love
it
Nine millimeter, heater stashed, in two-seaters with meat cleavers
I don't blame you, i wouldn't let hailie listen to me neither
Sing For The Moment
[Verse 1]
These ideas are nightmares to white parents
Whose worst fear is a child with dyed hair and who likes earrings
Like whatever they say has no bearing, it's so scary in a house that allows
no swearing
To see him walking around with his headphones blaring
Alone in his own zone, cold and he don't care
He's a problem child
And what bothers him all comes out, when he talks about
His fuckin' dad walkin' out
Cause he just hates him so bad that he blocks him out
If he ever saw him again he'd probably knock him out
His thoughts are whacked, he's mad so he's talkin' back
Talkin' black, brainwashed from rock and rap
He sags his pants, do-rags and a stocking cap
His step-father hit him, so he socked him back, and broke his nose
His house is a broken home, there's no control, he just let's his emotions
go...
[Chorus]
{C'mon}, sing with me, {sing}, sing for the years
{Sing it}, sing for the laughter, sing for the tears, {c'mon)
Sing it with me, just for today, maybe tomorrow the good Lord will take you
away...
/.../
They say music can alter moods and talk to you
Well can it load a gun up for you , and cock it too
Well if it can, then the next time you assault a dude
Just tell the judge it was my fault and i'll get sued
See what these kids do is hear about us totin' pistols
And they want to get one cause they think the shit's cool
Not knowin' we really just protectin' ourselves, we entertainers
Of course the shit's affectin' our sales, you ignoramus
But music is reflection of self, we just explain it, and then we get our
checks in the mail
It's fucked up ain't it
How we can come from practically nothing to being able to have any fuckin'
thing that we wanted
That's why we sing for these kids, who don't have a thing
Except for a dream, and a fuckin' rap magazine
Who post pin-up pictures on their walls all day long
Idolize they favorite rappers and know all they songs
Or for anyone who's ever been through shit in their lives
Till they sit and they cry at night wishin' they'd die
Till they throw on a rap record and they sit, and they vibe
We're nothin' to you but we're the fuckin' shit in they eyes
That's why we seize the moment try to freeze it and own it, squeeze it and
hold it
Cause we consider these minutes golden
And maybe they'll admit it when we're gone
Just let our spirits live on, through our lyrics that you hear in our
songs and we can...
Say What You Say
Cause what you say is what you say
Say what you say how you say it whenever you saying it
Just remember how you said it when you was spraying it
So who you playing with huh huh huh huh?
/.../
[Eminem]
If I could only use this power for good
I wouldn't, not even if I could
[Dr. Dre]
From the hood and I'm a hornet
And I'ma only sting when I'm cornered
[Eminem]
And I'ma only sucker punch or swing without warning
And swing to knock somebody's fucking head off
Cause I know, when they get up, I won't get a chance to let off
Another punch, I'm punk-rock, no one's punk
Don't give a fuck, white Pac, so much spunk
When I was little I knew I would blow up
And sell a mil or grow up to be a tiller
Go nuts and be a killer
/.../
But I handle my business cause it's work before play
Don't look for trouble but I serve you gourmet
However you want it, you could have it your way
You fuck my night up, I'ma fuck up your day
Bullet with your name, sending it your way
That goes for anyone who walks through that doorway
Cause this is my space, you invade it
Live to regret it and you die trying to violate it
Fuck around and you'll get annihilated
Eyes diliated
[Eminem]
Ha, like my old lady
Cause what you say is what you say Sometimes what you mean is 2 different things
Depending on your mood, if it swings, think too many things
And last, but not least (at least for this time):
Drips
Now I don't wanna hit no woman, but this chick's got it comin', someone better get this bitch,
before she get's kicked in the stomach, and she's pregnant, but she's eggin' me on, beggin' me
to throw her off the steps of this porch, my only weapon is force and I don't wanna resort to
any violence of any sort, but what's she shovin' me for, doesn't she love me no more, wasn't she
huggin' me four minutes ago at the door, man, i'm this close to goin' toe-to-toe with this
whore, what would you do if she was tellin' you she wants a divorce, she's havin' another baby
in a month, and it's yours, and you find out it isn't cause this bitch has been visitin' someone
else, and suckin' his dick and kissin' you on the lips when you get back, to Michigan, now the
plot is thickenin' worse, cause you feel like you've been stickin' your fuckin' dick in a
hearse, so you paranoid at every little cold that you get, ever since they told you this shit,
you've been holdin' your dick, so you go to the clinic, sweatin' every minute you in it, then
the doctor comes out lookin' like Dennis the Menace, and it's obvious to everyone in the lobby
it's AIDS, he ain't even gotta call you in his office to say it, so you jet back home, cause you
gon' get that hoe, when you see her, you gon' bend her fuckin' neck back, yo', cause you love her, you never would expect that blow, Obie told you the scoop, how could she stoop that low,
Jesus, I don't believe this, bitch works at the cleaners, bringin' me home diseases, swingin'
from Obie's penis, she's so deceivin', shit this hoe's a genius, she g'd us...
Now, all these songs and many more have influenced me greatly during my life. . . some more than others, some definitely saying more about myself than I could ever say about myself, some just good to listen to . . . and all of them with a special meaning known only to me.
PS! All lyrics I copied from www.azlyrics.com and I thank azlyrics for providing them and also I'd like to hope that no-one of any influence or importance happens to read this blog, otherwise I'd be in a little bit of a mess. But I'll continue to infringe copyright laws next time with a few more songs and some comedians...
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